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Sunday, October 26, 2014

Great Expectations

There is that moment where one is just SO filled with hope that indeed they feel as if they might fly away or burst. Oh I love that feeling.

I felt that feeling in the minutes before I was waiting to walk down the aisle towards my beloved. It enveloped me in the months leading up to the birth of my children. Even small moments can capture this feeling on a small scale such as when you order a delicious sounding dessert.

This feeling can quickly be followed by complete and amazing happiness. But on the flip side, waiting to rear its ugly head, is its evil cousin: disappointment.

We’ve all been there. That small moment when the pumpkin cheesecake made from Greek yogurt sounded like a good idea but one forkful and our great expectations are sent spiraling down in a disappointing crash and burn.

Lately it has felt as though I have been dealing with a few extra scoops of disappointment. While I am not going to dwell on the negative of the minor and major disappointments I have experienced of late I will talk about myself disappointment others.

By nature I am a people pleaser. I hate to disappoint anyone. Can anyone else relate to this image?

Right now I am stretched so thin you can almost see through me. It’s when this happens that I generally feel like I am disappointing  just about everyone and pleasing no one. Earlier this week I received a few emails wondering when was I going to start posting this years Halloween crafts and my costume tutorials. So there it was in writing: I was totally letting down my blog readers.

My first inclination was to look around and somehow try and find my glue gun. I just know it is here somewhere…

Yep, pretty much every room in my house looks like this:

Recently John and Sherry, of the uber popular Young House Love sent the DIY blog world into a tizzy when they announced they were laying down their hammer and glue gun. In that moment, while I was standing in a sea of boxes, I totally got it. It didn’t matter that in the last month I had made a major move across two states, almost single handedly painted every inch of a 3000 square foot home by myself, started school once again and somehow kept my family fed and clothed while living in a hotel. I had failed to make a new festive fall wreath and a historically accurate costume requiring 8 million man hours using only a piece of string and some silly putty.

I suspect that John and Sherry realized that no matter how many fabulous projects they created there was always going to be an insatiable beast on their backs that wanted MORE.

So I took a step back and asked myself “What is really important?”

Finding the sheets for our beds is really important.

Locating a dish to eat out of is pretty necessary.

Helping Sweet Boy create a 3D animal cell by Friday is a big priority.

Science Project | 3D Animal Cell

Secondary in importance is making sure that all the boxes get unpacked. The bathroom floors of the house, due to plumbing issues, all need a good scrubbing. The yard also needs some attention according to the HOA. Laundry and meals are always on the list and I need to see that my homework gets done. Lower on the list, but sometime before Friday, I need to buy a pumpkin or two and several bags of candy. I am looking forward to taking a break from the boxes and sitting out our driveway (in last years costume :) sharing treats and meeting our new neighbors.

It may be sad to some that blogging didn’t even make the top 10 on my “to do” list. 

But by choosing to focus on God’s will for my life I can never go wrong.

So am I permanently laying down my hammer and glue gun? Not at all. But I am taking a break for a few days to put the focus back on where it most needs to be that is pleasing to God.

But please know you matter deeply to me. Your friendship is a true treasure. If I can pray for you please don’t hesitate to leave a comment or email me.


“How can you believe, when you receive glory from one another and do not seek the glory that comes from the only God?” ~ John 5:44

“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” ~ Galatians 1:10

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,” ~ Colossians 3:23


Auntie Em said...

What a great post! Unless you are Superwoman or fly around in a glass airplane...I think you can and should be forgiven for not putting a seasonal craft on your blog. Especially this year. Wow!
Hope your classes are going well. Sweet Boy has definitely got the Mom with the 'Best Mom of the Year' award for the awesome cell project. And as for all the painting and tire me out just thinking of it! Hope Grandma Jingles is improving.
Now, your last years costumes are all new to the new neighbourhood folks (who will be amazed at this woman smiling and giving out treats after just moving in and going through renovations and raising a family plus going to school). Yup, still tires me out thinking about all you are doing!
Personally, I am very thankful when you post anything while dealing with everything going on around you. It's so wonderful to read about the good (and not so great) moments as you get settled into your new home. Thank you so much for sharing and caring so much about all your blog readers! Now, go put your feet up for a few minutes and rest your soul!
I just went out and took pictures of the amazing red sunrise. I was going to wait but I am glad I didn't. It's gone now. Lesson learned! :)

GSGreatEscaper said...

If you moved into my neighborhood and wore that amazing 18th c costume to give out candy, I'd be over the moon. (In this town, actually, anyone with a costume like that would be immediately drafted into some historical tourism job....) I'm sad that some people aren't understanding of your life situation and I know that you must do what you have to do, of course.

I hope Grandma is as well as she can be.

I look forward to the future posts which I am sure will be amazing - and the cell looks amazing! Get SB to guest post that!

Ann@A Sentimental Life said...

I read some blogs and are so overwhelmed with what they get done compared to me! The older I get the harder it seems to just keep the house clean and get to work with clean clothes. Take time to focus on that beautiful new house and your son. We have to live our lives that should be our first priority before blogging. Enjoy your break, we will be here when you get back!

Karena Albert said...

Dear Laura, I hope that you know you are my friend whether you blog once a month, once a week or decide to take a long break! I also don't care if you ever show us how to make costumes or Halloween / Fall decorations ever again. Really!! There are much higher priorities during many times in our lives than pleasing the desires of others. We also ebb and flow in our own interests and those reflect in our sites and our lives. You have already left your footprint on Earth as God has wanted you to.

The Arts by Karena

Kelley said...

I teach couples and mentees, "[Great] expectation greases the wheels of [great] frustration." I have moved 20 times in 33 years of marriage. One of those was a move-out as a blogger and one was a move-in as a blogger.

I get it now. No two moves are identical. Life changes. Get a grip on it.

I ask people sometimes, "How do you spell 'parent'?" G-U-I-L-T

I should ask, "How do you spell 'blogger'?" G-U-I-L-T

Ditch it. Your priorities are where they need and ought to be, Laura, with your family's needs at the top of "The List." I heard someone the other day say, "Every day I schedule two hours of nothing so I'm prepared for the unexpected. Then I force myself each day to cross off my list three things that WILL NOT GET DONE." She explained that this helps her pry her fingers off of her control-issues and put her day in the hands of the Lord. Boy, do I wish I had heard some of this wise woman's admonition when I was younger and in that season.

I pray Psalm 90:17 for you, Laura. Take a blog break, indefinitely. Your readers aren't going anywhere. We'll be here when you're rested and caught up and bursting to share. DON'T RUSH! You're going to wonder why you didn't do this sooner.

Hugs and happy X-ing off the list,
Kelley~ *mwah* {<-- You needed that.}

marty (A Stroll Thru Life) said...

You do twice what most of us do, so I can't imagine why anyone would think in the middle of this move you have to make a costume. That is totally insane. Obviously they don't know you are moving or they wouldn't say such a thing. Just relax, Your family and home should always come first and blogging can fit in whenever. So wish I was there to give you a hand or just give you a break and take you to lunch.

Gypsy Heart said...

Others expectations of you shouldn't even register in your lovely heart and mind. I feel exhausted each time I read one of your posts! I honestly don't know how you've accomplished so much. Last year when I was preparing to move, I had problems with the neighbors upstairs (old place), stressed re: packing & back problems, my brother almost died and we lost Abby. Thank God, incredible people from church stepped in and handled it! I had no thought of blogging and of course, my state of mind was not something people would want to read.

I hope that you will take as much time as you need ~ everyone will still be here when you return! Your well being and your family are priorities. It goes without saying that God is with you every moment...just lean on Him. If you ever want to meet for lunch or tea, I'd love to treat!

Take all the time your body, mind and spirit need ~

Terri Steffes said...

I am sorry, those who are requesting anything of you right now (from the blogging world, not your family!) are just darned selfish! I am grateful for the times we get to hear from you and I consider my self blessed! Do what you need to do, and when you can, check in! Remember, there are those of us who just simply feel that any contact we get we are blessed to receive. Hugs.

ohiofarmgirl said...

I laid down that ghost long ago. I do what I do and if people enjoy it then I am happy but in this time of grief I know I move slower and I can't even think of a craft that would be enjoyable. I do now worry about those who disapprove but wander on my way at my pace. I don't look back and it's not a competition...although you would think it was. Give yourself a break and spend some time with your family, prepare your house and home for the Holidays...listen to your children and take care of your are doing great! Dianntha

Jill Cooper said...

Hey your blog is YOUR blog to do with what you want. And maybe, just maybe that blogger was really giving you a compliment, albeit one that they didn't realize would be taken the way it was - they love your creations. So while you may give them the benefit of the doubt - take whatever time YOU need to decompress and get done what you need to get done. Big hugs and happy Halloween!

Magali@TheLittleWhiteHouse said...

I'm completely amazed at the pressure blogland can put on bloggers. Enjoy the present between boxes as much as you can and don't worry about yet an other project... Any way, I'm pretty sure most bloggers are already thinking about their Christmas tree!

Grace @ Sense and Simplicity said...

You said it girl! You need to do what needs to get done and blogging doesn't make that first, second, or third round of cuts. When you have life more in balance then your blog (and your readers) will be waiting.

Lorrie said...

Amen, sister! I can't believe someone would actually contact you about Halloween ideas on your blog given your circumstances. You do what you need to do for God and family first - blogging is just a sideline! Breathe deeply. We love you.

Pat@Life At Lydias House said...

It is way too easy to get caught up in expectations and comparisons in the blogosphere. I just keep reminding myself why I put forth the effort to maintain a blog in order to keep things in perspective. I know that you share my belief that family comes before the blog. I have no idea how you have the energy to do all that you do. Keep chipping away at getting settled in and we will look forward to reading your posts when you are able to pick up again.

bettyann said...

Dear Laura..Please do not feel you have to please your readers. I am interested in you. So please take care..and do what you have to for your family. <3

Rita C. said...

Laura, my wish for you is peace of mind and heart. There's type A and B personalities, but were you aware there's also type E - striving to be everything to everybody? I know this because I used to be this type, but am happy that I finally settled into A - age, retirement, kids becoming independent - not sure exactly when - but it will happen. It's hard to let go. I can so remember the making of the 3D cell! I hope your week is about leveling those expectations within and finding peace.

kimber said...

Not sure what happened to my post so here goes again...Thank you so much for the posts you do share. I have been enjoying your newest adventure and have been totally blown away that you have had any time to post. Please take time for yourself and your family. This is a whole new world you all are adjusting to and if I can be of any assistance please do not hesitate to ask. I am on the northeast side of Ft Worth (Watauga) and would love to help you in any way. So happy that you are a "neighbor" xoxo~kimber

Jane said...

Laura, you have a fantastic blog, but please don't worry one bit about how often you post or what types of posts you've had in the past! My goodness, with all you have to do I'm amazed that you can post at all! Hard to believe people wouldn't consider what all you have going on just now, but I suppose it's because you have us spoiled :) Please take care of yourself and your family, including the cute doggies, and your lovely new home. Then do what you want with your blog. xo Jane p.s. Please don't think you have to reply to each comment either!

Miss Jane said...

Hearing that you're feeling pressured by some of your blog followers is quite concerning. Whatever happened to "do unto others..." There's something about social media and other non-personal internet communicaiton that has been misinterpreted by some as an entitlement to say whatever they want, whenever they want. I believe that the worst offenders wouldn't have the nerve to make their unkind, judgemental & thoughtless comments in person but they feel safe & empowered when they're online.
Clearly, from the comments above, all of your true fans & friends completely understand that you need some time to yourself and for your family - some much deserved REST!!
With God all things are possible, even getting the rooms painted and the boxes unpacked.

Susan Nowell @ My Place to Yours said...

Laura, many of us have found ourselves posting less—and living more—lately. I think God is getting our attention... Listen to your heart, and don't worry about the blog unless/until it feels right again. Praying for you, my friend!


Yes, you need to take care of yourself and your family and your home! Take the time you need!

Burlap Luxe said...

Take all the much needed time you need sometimes we need to meet our own needs. I do have to mention the animal cell made me smile, I so remember making this very cell, but we used a big orange gourd and cut through it and filled it with bits of foam. Then worked on the gogibodies and reticulum if that's even how they are spelled, it's been so long lol !
Take care.

See you soon.



Jill Flory of Sew a Fine Seam said...

good for you Laura! Blogging can wait - and I am convinced there will always be someone waiting to read what we write whenever we get back to it! I've let it slide a lot this summer simply because I cannot do everything!

Carol said...

Good for you, Laura! I think you are very smart to have figured out the priorities. When fellow, well-intended bloggers begin to add to your stress level, then it is indeed time to step back. I think you have done amazing things to your new home in a very short amount of time. When we moved into our current home three years ago, I had this self-imposed pressure to get everything unpacked and picture-worthy, but my hubby had other ideas. We would work on unpacking (or some diys) for a couple of days, and then we would go exploring. Just those "one-day" breaks made such a difference in our attitude and stamina for the working days. I know it's different for you, because you do have a family to care for; but it's only your family's needs that are the priority -- definitely not any of us in blogland!